Understanding – Heal ThySELF DVM http://www.healthyselfdvm.com Re-Igniting Your Love of Veterinary Medicine Wed, 06 Dec 2017 16:56:34 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.2.21 There are Two Sides to Every Coin http://www.healthyselfdvm.com/there-are-two-sides-to-every-coin/ Wed, 06 Dec 2017 16:50:05 +0000 http://www.healthyselfdvm.com/?p=1254 Continue reading "There are Two Sides to Every Coin"]]> There are 2 sides to every coin.  There are at least 2 sides to every story.

 What I want to share with you today is an idea, that might raise some resistance in you at first, but just sit with it and see if it makes sense in the long run.

My goal in my day is to always look for the thoughts that allow me to feel better.  In all the situations I deal with in a day, I try and find a way of looking at them that allows me to transcend the yucky, depleting emotions. I try and find a perspective that allows me to stay grounded and centered, feeling good.  So here is a thought for this week for you to play with:

Your perspective is not the only one.


There, that’s the ground shattering truth.  

Your perspective is not the only one.

What if that client that is declining the blood work truly does love her dog?
What if she has no money to spare?
What if she wants to do more, but is afraid you will find a cancer and she is battling it herself and cannot bear to think her dog has it as well?
What if she just buried her husband a year ago and is unable to face the fact that she may have to bury her dog as well?
What if she is in debt by tens of thousands of dollars and is embarrassed that she will be declined by Care Credit?
What if she is being abused by her daughter and feels helpless to make any decisions?

What if, what if, what if…

What if you decide she is just being stupid, uncaring or mean to the pet? What if you shower her, even unconsciously, with your feelings of anger and judgement?  How would that feel to her?   Might she respond with words of anger and accusations?  Might she cause a scene in your lobby out of frustration and fear for her dog?

Could all of that energy that is being focused by you on her unwillingness to do the blood work be used in a better way?  Perhaps to silently send her love and understanding, not knowing why she won’t do the blood work but respecting her rights.  Perhaps ask her gently and softly why, and then give her the time and space to get the courage to tell you.  How about energetically allowing her the dignity to make her decision and not feel judged or demeaned for it.

We have so much power in our hands.  We are the Doctor! (shout out to Dr Who fans!)  We are the authority, but we cannot possibly know why people make the decisions they make.  

Your perspective is not the only one.  Everyone involved in that pet’s care has an opinion on what should be done and why.  And often, those choices are steeped in our culture and our upbringing.

The next time you are faced with someone not agreeing to your treatment plan, or getting angry with you over a diagnosis, take a moment to consider that they are scared, really really scared of something they are not telling you. Allow them to make the decision that is right for them.  Know that you can do your job perfectly and still have them decline your recommendations.

There are always 2 sides to the coin.  Yours and theirs.  Allow for the possibility that your perspective is not the only one.  You are not responsible for their decisions. Your life will be better for practicing this belief.  

Next week we’ll look at how to diffuse your anger and frustrations in this kind of situation.
]]>