Hope you enjoy the video and I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comment section of the ‘Q 24 hr, Your Daily Dose of Vet Med Success’!

As always, you can set up a 1:1 call with me to explore what you are wanting to create in your life at https://calendly.com/healthyselfdvm!

To me this means that as I live my life, I can look for, and find, evidence to support almost any belief I have. For example, the other day I was feeling like I couldn’t diagnose any patient I saw. Everything was baffling and hard for me.  I felt like an imposter.

Have you ever felt that way?

It is a powerful feeling. It can take over and make every future decision more difficult and lead to a downward spiral.  

But then I stopped myself, took a breath and looked for evidence to contradict the belief that “I am an imposter.”

I thought about the cases where I nailed the diagnosis. I thought about the cases where even without a firm diagnosis the animal responded to the treatment. I allowed myself to believe the evidence “I am a good diagnostician and doctor!” I moved forward with my day more confidently as I kept remembering the evidence.

Now, yes, for those of you sitting there saying that there are times when I did miss the diagnosis or the animal did not respond and so I could have latched onto those times.  You are right, so true, so true. I don’t always get it right.

BUT, the idea here is to look for evidence of what will make me feel better and see if it exists. And it does, for me and for you.

So let’s try and use evidence based living more in our lives in and out of the clinic. I am positive you can find evidence to support any idea you want to have.

Why not choose thoughts that allow you to feel better, stronger, bigger and more adept? That’s the key! Choose the thoughts you want to feel and back them up with evidence from your past and move forward.

Today I am sharing a video from Lisa Nichols, a transformational speaker. In this video she talks about second guessing yourself and how to stop it. I thought it was a powerful video and it speaks to looking for the evidence. You can view the video by clicking here.

NOTE: Lisa starts the video with responses to comments from previous videos so you can skip to the 2:22 mark if you only want to hear about second chances. But I think there is great information as well in the first minutes even if you haven’t watched her before. It’s only 10 min long so enjoy!

As always, you can set up a 1:1 call with me to explore what you are wanting to create in your life at  https://calendly.com/healthyselfdvm!

“Is this piece of paper I just knocked on the floor going to levitate back up to me, or just stay on the floor today?”

What would happen if you took a cue from our cat friends, and approached the interactions in your life as if you didn’t know what would happen next? Can you imagine having conversations free of expectations, assumptions, and generalities? Is that even possible?

Test it out….

What if in EVERY conversation and interaction you have with your clients or even family members, you just decided to be open and present to them? Can you imagine how it would feel if people came to YOU without any of their preconceived notions?

Check out the latest episode of the Q 24 hr, Your Daily Dose of Vet Med Success to learn how you can begin playing with the concept of testing gravity in your everyday interactions, much like a cat does.

Take the time to test out this idea today, and let me know how it goes! You can reach out to me directly at pamela@healthyselfdvm.com.

As always, you can set up a 1:1 call with me to explore what you are wanting to create in your life at  https://calendly.com/healthyselfdvm!

Tune into the latest episode of the Q 24 hr, Your Daily Dose of Vet Med Success to examine how you can improve and shift your inner-story!

I would love to hear how this impacts your day in the comment section of the video and as always you can reach me at pamela@healthyselfdvm.com.

Whew, ok, thank you for indulging me.   So I have never been particularly religious.  I was raised Catholic but I never really accepted the institution of religion.  I always wondered why I needed the clergy and all the pomp and circumstance.  I went through a very strong existential period in high school where I was very certain that we lived and we died and that was it.  And then I lived the majority of my life without any significant religious or spiritual leanings.  But deep down I have always felt there was something out there, something that I could see in the animals eyes and way of being that was bigger than me.   

Now, I was also very into the sciences and wanted to be a veterinarian from the time I knew what that was.  At that time, my understanding was you had to be either religious or scientific.  There did not seem to be any middle ground or ability for the two ideas to co exist.  You had to chose.  Through my journey as a veterinarian, though, I have needed to find a framework to deal with all the big emotions we deal with and the fact that we take lives. Science did not help me with it.  I was becoming more depressed and disengaged from the world.  What worked for me was discovering the idea of spirituality.  

The way I describe the difference is that religion is an institution with an unchanging, agreed-upon ideology. Spirituality affords me the autonomy to choose beliefs that work for me and allowed me to navigate the emotions and tasks of our job and find honor and comfort in them.  One belief I have adopted is that that we are all connected. That there is a power greater than all of us that connects us and can be tapped into for wisdom and grace.  You can call it Source, the Universe, God, divinity etc.  The word divinity or God used to strike fear in me.  I couldn’t even say the word God because I had such a negative experience around religion.  I started calling that higher power the Universe.  That was innocuous enough a word for me to use.  I have slowly come to the point that I can say the word God  without a shudder and I am happy for those that receive comfort from those words. For me, divinity does not mean God, it means the higher power, the greater wisdom that is out there.  

I believe we are all part of this divine wisdom. I believe that we are all striving to connect to it as deeply as we can in this lifetime, as that allows us to deeply connect with others.    

See if you can feel the divine in yourself.  Feel the connection to mother nature, to animals, to other humans. You may not completely believe yet, but let it percolate a little. And consider that if you are divine, so are the animals and people you interact with daily. See them as divine. Extend to them the same things you ask for yourself-to be respected, supported, and given the right to make your own choices.

This idea, that we are all connected and all part of the same higher wisdom, has allowed me to release a lot of the stress and anger I used to feel at work.  I used to get angry and upset with the decisions that clients made. I used to get very stressed trying to make sure the staff was doing their jobs correctly.  And the toll of euthanasias was dragging me down.  

As I started to explore the idea of being open to tapping into the wisdom of a higher power and seeing that power in others I was introduced to a tool that worked for me and I’ll share it with you.  

First, pretend that you have special eye glasses.  These glasses make the higher wisdom, the divinity in other people visible.  For me, the glasses showed me the Universe wisdom in others as a sparkly aura around them.  It could be different for you. I would mentally put the glasses on when I was having a difficulty with a person-maybe a client not hearing my recommendations, maybe a co-worker getting on my last nerve, maybe a pet being difficult as well.  By doing this and imagining the aura showing up I was reminding myself of how I would want to be treated in this situation.  It allowed me to then take a breath, find a new perspective and be content with the situation and how it resolved. The glasses were instrumental in changing how I interacted with people.  

So I encourage you to design your Source or divinity finding glasses and use them especially when you find yourself getting frustrated or angry at someone.  If not for their sake, then for yours.  

If we can give to others those experiences we want for ourselves, our days go much smoother.  Grant others the support, love and understanding that you are seeking for yourself. It doesn’t make you weak. Seeing others in a divine light doesn’t make them infallible either. It simply allows you to breathe, stay focused on your goals and make decisions based out of love not fear. You can be an effective doctor, tech or manager and still see the divine in others. It doesn’t change what happens, it changes how you deal with it.  

Let me know what you think of these ideas.  Are you more scientific minded or religious/spiritual minded and how does it help you move through the day?  I want to know.  You can reach me at pamela@healhthyselfdvm.com

What is a belief that you would like to let go of?
What belief is holding you back, making you feel mad, angry or frustrated, making you feel less than you know you are?
Are you ready to let it go?

2018 is a year to take your power back and feel how you want to feel.  

I believe:

Our thoughts create our emotions.
We are in charge of our thoughts.
Therefore, we are in charge of our emotions.

So what thought is creating yucky feelings for you.  Let’s take an example.  Perhaps you believe you are unappreciated at work.  What emotion does that cause in you?  Sadness?  Anger? Frustration?  Take a moment and think the thought “I am unappreciated at work.”  What sensations does that create in your body?  Where are those sensations located?  Don’t try and change anything, just notice it.  

Now, can you say for 100% certain that you are unappreciated at work? Perhaps no one says thank you but they think it.  Perhaps if we asked your co workers they would say that they really do appreciate all you do at work to make the day go smoothly.  

So, can you agree that you cannot be 100% sure you are not appreciated?  Even if you still believe you are unappreciated at work, are you ready to change that belief and feel better?

Let’s create an affirmation about this.  

“I am appreciated at work.  I am an important part of the business and I know I do my best every day.”

Let’s also think back to a time where you know you were appreciated. Maybe someone said a heartfelt thank you for something you did.  Maybe someone gave you a high five or a hug for something you did.  Think about that time and notice what emotion you feel.  Is it happiness, worthiness, joy?  Where in your body do you feel it?  

Take that memory and the feeling of your body and use it when you say your affirmation.  You do know what being appreciated feels like so create it in your body daily, multiple times.

We know that for any belief you can find evidence in your life to support it.  So when you feel unappreciated you can find times when no one thanked you, maybe times they even gave your grief.  BUT,  I suggest that you can also find at least 1 time when someone said thank you. And if not, that’s OK. You have experienced appreciation at some point in your life and you can draw on that.  As you go through the next few days and weeks using these tools I believe that you will find evidence that people do appreciate you at work right now, or at the very least, in other areas of your life.  That’s the magic of this work.  

So I want you to be conscious of what thoughts you think, what emotions they create and if those emotions are serving you or not.  If not, what thought might feel better and create an affirmation, a visualization, a memory of what it felt like and use it to create a new belief that becomes part of you.

A belief is just a thought that has been thought so much that it becomes truth.

Take your power back.  You are in charge of your thoughts.  Your thoughts create your emotions.  You are in charge of your emotions.  It takes some awareness and some discipline but I know you got this!!

If this resonated with you or you would like to explore the process more, please sign up  for a free phone conversation about something that you would like to change in your life.

You can pick your time at https://calendly.com/healthyselfdvm.

First, a little background discussion about emotions.  We have typically labeled emotions as good or bad, but I believe all emotions are good. They point us in the directions we want to go.  When we feel sad it is an invitation to find thoughts that feel better to move toward contentment, or hopefulness, for example.   

Anger is an emotion that feels better than hopelessness or sadness.  Anger has movement to it — we are often physically agitated, we use our breath and voices more, our hearts beat faster — all forms of movement. Movement usually feels better than stasis – hopelessness or overwhelm; where you want to be still and curled up in a ball.  

The question to ask yourself is: WHY am I angry?  And the answer cannot be based on someone else’s actions or words.  What the person did or said is not important, the important thing is how it made you feel and WHY.  Let’s look at a possible scenario:

Client comes in with a sick dog.  Not life threatening but definitely in need of medical assistance.  You make recommendations. Client declines all, just wants a shot of antibiotic for the dog.  You get increasingly angry at their refusal to do anything else.

Why are you angry?  What is the underlying belief that you have that is causing you to get angry?

Are you angry because in declining, they imply you don’t have the right answers?  You believe you are an imposter or a liar.  

Are you angry because you believe that their declining of your recommendations shows that you lack the ability to communicate effectively? You are a failure.  

Are you angry because you feel the animal is helpless and you are their only hope? You are helpless.

We can see from these possibilities that anger is often the outward expression of denying other lower emotions or beliefs – helplessness, failure, incompetence, sadness, frustration.

If you can name the underlying reason why you are angry, then it is possible to play with it and diffuse it by changing your thoughts.  This can be done in the safety of your home so that you can be a little more prepared the next time anger wells up inside of you.

There are many ways to let go of the underlying beliefs and we will explore them in the coming weeks.  

Today I want you to play with the idea that you always do your best.  That statement is simple, you say. Of course I always do my best!  But how often do you beat yourself up for not knowing something, or having an animal die unexpectedly, or believing you missed something on an exam?  We do it all the time.  But if we truly believe that we always do our best, then there is no reason for beating ourselves up.  

That negative self talk has no place in our brain.  You always do your best. Yes, you cannot know everything.  Yes, mother nature sometimes has her own plans.  Yes, you may have missed something on an exam, but it doesn’t mean you didn’t do your best.  It means you are human.  And it means there is always more to learn.  That’s it.  In every situation there is always more to learn-even when the outcomes are terrific and defy the odds-there is something to learn.

And, let’s flip that statement around to the staff, the clients, the public.  Everyone always does their best!  The place that understanding and compassion comes from is realizing that their best is not necessarily in line with what you would do.  And that is ok.  It is their best.  There is no reflection whatsoever on you. You did your best – examining, diagnosing, creating the treatment plan, doing the surgery, etc.  There is no reflection on you no matter what they chose to do and no matter the outcome. If you believe that you did your best then there can be no judgments and no negative self talk.

So, one way to diffuse the anger is to adopt the belief that you always do your best. I give you permission to say this!  Give yourself permission as well. The outcome is not in your hands. There is nothing else that can be asked of you but to do your best.  Learn, grow, explore yes, but no beating up on yourself.  

You are a rockstar bad ass veterinarian and you always do your best.

 What I want to share with you today is an idea, that might raise some resistance in you at first, but just sit with it and see if it makes sense in the long run.

My goal in my day is to always look for the thoughts that allow me to feel better.  In all the situations I deal with in a day, I try and find a way of looking at them that allows me to transcend the yucky, depleting emotions. I try and find a perspective that allows me to stay grounded and centered, feeling good.  So here is a thought for this week for you to play with:

Your perspective is not the only one.

There, that’s the ground shattering truth.  

Your perspective is not the only one.

What if that client that is declining the blood work truly does love her dog?
What if she has no money to spare?
What if she wants to do more, but is afraid you will find a cancer and she is battling it herself and cannot bear to think her dog has it as well?
What if she just buried her husband a year ago and is unable to face the fact that she may have to bury her dog as well?
What if she is in debt by tens of thousands of dollars and is embarrassed that she will be declined by Care Credit?
What if she is being abused by her daughter and feels helpless to make any decisions?

What if, what if, what if…

What if you decide she is just being stupid, uncaring or mean to the pet? What if you shower her, even unconsciously, with your feelings of anger and judgement?  How would that feel to her?   Might she respond with words of anger and accusations?  Might she cause a scene in your lobby out of frustration and fear for her dog?

Could all of that energy that is being focused by you on her unwillingness to do the blood work be used in a better way?  Perhaps to silently send her love and understanding, not knowing why she won’t do the blood work but respecting her rights.  Perhaps ask her gently and softly why, and then give her the time and space to get the courage to tell you.  How about energetically allowing her the dignity to make her decision and not feel judged or demeaned for it.

We have so much power in our hands.  We are the Doctor! (shout out to Dr Who fans!)  We are the authority, but we cannot possibly know why people make the decisions they make.  

Your perspective is not the only one.  Everyone involved in that pet’s care has an opinion on what should be done and why.  And often, those choices are steeped in our culture and our upbringing.

The next time you are faced with someone not agreeing to your treatment plan, or getting angry with you over a diagnosis, take a moment to consider that they are scared, really really scared of something they are not telling you. Allow them to make the decision that is right for them.  Know that you can do your job perfectly and still have them decline your recommendations.

There are always 2 sides to the coin.  Yours and theirs.  Allow for the possibility that your perspective is not the only one.  You are not responsible for their decisions. Your life will be better for practicing this belief.  

Next week we’ll look at how to diffuse your anger and frustrations in this kind of situation.

The key to affirmations is that they need to be stated in a positive way and they need to resonate or mean something to you.

So first-keep them positive-no negative words like not, don’t, won’t, never etc. Instead use words like always, am, and do.

So for example a poorly worded affirmation is:

I am not responsible for how others feel.

The reason this is a poorly worded one is the word not. Interestingly, your brain does not recognize the word not, it hears “I am responsible for how others feel” which is absolutely untrue. And, another reason is that we always want to put positive thoughts into the world.

So a better way to frame the affirmation is:

I am at peace with knowing that I am only responsible for my emotions. Others are responsible for their own.

See the difference? Say the poorly worded one and the better one out loud and notice the difference in your body. Which makes you feel better?

Affirmations can be used in many ways, but one of the simplest is to repeat them out loud multiple times a day. And for more power, say them while looking at yourself in a mirror. So, SO transformative then. Saying them adds POWER. It makes believing them easier. Try it and see! You can create them yourself but I will give you a few to try on and see how they feel.

Affirmations:

I am at peace knowing that I am only responsible for MY emotions. Others are responsible for theirs.

I am a Rock Star Bad Ass Veterinarian!

I am beautiful inside and out.

I move through my day with ease and confidence.

I do my best every day and in every way.

Try writing your own affirmations. I’d love to hear what you create and how they transform your life at pamela@healthyselfdvm.com

Now, granted it is a little airbrushed and wind machine aided hollywood style but look at the stance. It embodies to me an easy confidence in herself. Her shoulders are back, her back is strong, her core is strong yet exposed, and her eyes are soft yet focused on what’s in front of her.

It has been shown that our body posture reflects our emotions. When we are sad or depressed we tend to slouch, round our shoulders, look down, not make eye contact, talk softly. When we are mad we are standing tall, leaning forward, muscles tense, eyes laser focused, brows furrowed.

The cool thing is that our body can create our emotions! Yep! All those synapses that create our posture also hold the keys to our emotions. Holding our body in certain ways creates emotion, thoughts and habitual ways of acting.

So this week, I want you to first notice how you hold yourself throughout the day. How do you stand when feeling confident? How about when a client is questioning you? How about when a cute puppy or kitten comes in? Notice how your body stance changes, your facial muscles feel, your back feels.

Now, practice your version of Wonder Woman. We’ll call her Wonder Vet!!!!!! Stand tall but relaxed, shoulder blades rolled back and down, weight going down through the ground, eyes focused but soft allowing you to see peripherally, and feel your breath expanding in your core, your abdomen.

I encourage you to practice your Wonder Vet stance in the privacy of your home and then take her out with you! When you are delivering a diagnosis, an estimate, a treatment plan, stand in your body’s version of confidence and strength and see the difference it can make in the way the information is given and received. I think you will find it a wonderful experiment!